My scars are a reminder of the times when obstacles in life tried to break me, but failed. I like to think of my bodily scars as a reminder of growth and my highest form of strength. They weren’t always though and sometimes they still aren’t. I use to look at my scars and feel sadness for all that I have endured, I felt embarrassed and I hid my body. So embarrassed that I couldn’t even look at myself in the mirror without crying. Along side my scars, I grew up in a society that told me that I need to be thin, have no pores HA! and that I must look a certain way in order to be labeled worthy and “beautiful”. That unrealistic bar of expectations lead to an eating disorder at a young age. I felt as worthless as ever and I lost control.
But there is healing in acknowledging your vulnerability.
I am still learning and I always will be. But I am no longer ashamed of who I am and I sure as hell don’t find myself apologising for how I look or for who I am. I know that my past is not a prison, my past pains are my biggest lessons and my pain and scars are why I am proudly the woman that I am today. My past is why I spend my time supporting others in practicing self love. Each mark and scar on my body tells a story of something that I have endured and overcome so I guess what I am trying to say is.. There is no shame in having a past, we all have one! There is no shame in having stretch marks, ageing, scars, pores, acne, dimples, creases ect; These are not imperfections,
THESE ARE WHAT MAKE YOU F***ING HUMAN!
I’m here to tell you that your pain is valid. Your suffering is worth consolation. Your mistakes and scars, whether they are visible or not, do not translate to worthlessness. Your insecurities are worth fighting through.
You are human. You are alive and therefore you have options. You are resilient and brave, even if you don’t believe this yourself. The fact that you’re here right now counts for something! You went through something and you came out the other side. Maybe shaken, maybe scarred, but you are here! You shouldn’t feel as though your pain or scars are worth nothing simply because you know other stories seem worse by comparison. This is not a game. There is no trauma and pain Olympics, where only the worst suffering is consoled and helped to heal. So together, lets work on realising that scales do not measure our worth. Lets work on letting go of societies standards and start focusing on our health both physically and mentally. Lets work on loving our bodies and not only speaking kindly to ourselves but believing it!
Ladies, we are not in competition with each other. Our lives, bodies and experiences are not up for comparison.
Let us focus on support and encouragement because in a society that profits from your self-doubt, loving yourself is a rebellious act. So be the rebel that I know you can be. Love yourself and thank your middle finger for sticking up for you when you needed it most!
Society says you need *insert ridiculous expenses and products here* in order to be beautiful, loveable and worthy, but I’m standing here yelling f**k society’s unrealistic standards! You have it within you to exist on your own terms. YOU ARE ENOUGH! You are and always have been.
Want to know how to feel accomplished and be successful in life? Invest in yourself! Know that no-one can determine your value expect for you. So this is your reminder to check yourself. Let go of focusing on self limiting beliefs and embrace your self-worth because I can promise you with complete certainty that you are worth far more than you realise, it’s just a matter of believing in yourself.
Granted, self love is a journey with many setbacks and many rises BUT you are not expected to love yourself with a flick of a switch, this shit is hard! It’s a commitment and a journey so I am not sitting here telling you to unrealistically change your mindset like its an easy thing to do. I am simply telling you that if you’re struggling to love yourself, love who you are yet to become, love what you have overcome! Love what you have survived and learned through. Love who you are growing to be and who you aspire to be.
Self-love has no limits, all you need is love!
So start now. Not tomorrow, not Monday, not next week, TODAY. It’s time to step up and claim the life that you deserve and it starts by believing in YOU. You’re the queen of your own damn empire Mumma, own your kingdom! Be the savage, kick-ass queen that you are! And above anything else, know that you are important, you are beautiful, you are capable, you are loved and YOU ARE ENOUGH!
Visible or invisible, your scars, mistake, and past have made you who you are today. So own that shit girl, be proud of the person you are and are yet to become and if in doubt, contact me and we will hash it out. You my friend are stronger than you realise and I’m simply here to remind you of your worth because you are so deserving of loving yourself.
xoxo Ann Toscano